An old lady is speeding down a highway, when she spots a police officer with a speed gun.

The officer motions for her to pull over, then approaches up and asks her, smiling: “What’s the rush?” “I’m late for work.” “Sure,” the officer replies, “What do you do?” “I’m a rectal distender.”

“A what?” A rectal distender? “What exactly is that?” “Well, you see, I start with one finger, then another, and so on, until the entire hand is in. I work from side to side until I can fit both hands in, and then I slowly but steadily enlarge the rectum until it’s approximately 6 feet wide.”“And what the hell do you do with a 6 feet asshole?” “Give him a speed gun and put him by the side of the road.”

Related Posts

He became a father at 13, while she became a mother at 13, but wait till you see how the youngest parents looks like now Check the 1st comment

April Webster and Nathan Fishbourne made headlines in 2010 as the youngest parents in the United Kingdom. April was 13 when she became pregnant, and Nathan was…

They left watching the unthinkable. “Dallas Air Show turned into horror — 6 heroes gone instantly ..See more

Two historic aircraft, a Boeing B-17 Flying Fortress and a Bell P-63 Kingcobra, collided during a demonstration flight. The incident shocked spectators and drew international attention, highlighting…

Late at Night, a Little Girl Called the Police Saying Her Parents Wouldn’t Wake Up

The dim glow of the streetlights filtered through the curtains, casting long shadows across the bedroom. The officers stepped inside cautiously, their training having prepared them for…

A billionaire paused to help a homeless woman who collapsed while her twins screamed — and he froze when he saw the toddlers were identical to him

A Collapse on the Sidewalk A homeless woman collapsed by the roadside, her 2-year-old twins sobbing next to her. When a passing billionaire stopped to help, he…

Police find boy missing since 2022: ‘He was n… See more in comment

The town froze when the news broke. A boy, missing since 2022, had finally been found alive. Tears, screams, disbelief—every emotion crashed at once. For years, his…

That Small ‘Leaf’ on My Floor That Made Me Stop in My Tracks

The Tiny ‘Leaf’ That Stopped Me in My Tracks It began as a small, almost invisible moment—a tiny green shape on the floor that I assumed was…