This woman wasn’t feeling well, so she went to see the family doctor.
After hearing her symptoms, the doctor scheduled her for a complete physical. The next day, she returned to get the results. The doctor tells her that everything came back normal.

He asks, “How’s your appetite?”

She replied, “Great! I eat like a horse.”

He then asks, “Do you sleep well?”

“About 8 hours a night,” she said.

“How about your bowels?” he asks.

“I go every morning about 7:20 AM,” she replied.

The doctor thinks for a minute, then says, “Something is going on that I can’t put my finger on. I’m going to give you an antibiotic and see if that will cure the problem.”

There are three germs inside that are listening to all of this, and one of them says, “What are we going to do?”

One says, “I think I’ll hide in the liver.”

A second one says, “I think I’ll hide in a kidney.”

The last one says, “You guys can stick around if you want to, but I’m taking the 7:20 out of here.”

==============================================
Two doctors, Dean and Gable, are treating a man with lung disease.
They’re explaining how his sm.o.king w*d has led to his condition worsening.

“But it’s just herbal!” the patient protested. “How can it be bad?” Dr. Jenkins sighed.

“Nature isn’t all innocent. Apricot stones contain lethal amounts of cyanide. There is a certain plant in my back garden – if you sit under it for just 5 minutes, you will die. Just because it’s natural doesn’t mean it’s safe for you!”

The man seemed to accept that, and promised to stop his smoking.

After he left, the doctors went to lunch. As they were sitting down to eat, Dr. Smith asked, “Oh by the way, what IS that plant that kills you if you sit under it?”

“A water lily.”

==============================================
A new miracle doctor was in town.
He could cure anything and anybody, and everyone was amazed with what he can do except for Bhola, the town’s grouch.

So Bhola went to this ‘Miracle Doctor’ to prove that he wasn’t so miraculous.

He goes and tells the doctor, “Hey, doc, I have lost my sense of taste. I can’t taste nothing, so what are you going to do?”

The doctor scratches his head and mumbles to himself a little, then tell Bhola, “What you need is jar number 43.”

“Jar number 43?”, Bhola wonders.

So the doctor leaves and after five minutes brings a jar and tells Bhola to taste it.

He tastes it and immediately spits it out, “This is Shit!” he yells.

“I just restored your sense of taste Bhola,” says the doctor.

So Bhola goes home very mad.

One month later, Bhola goes back to the doctor along with a new problem, “Doc,” he starts, “I can’t remember!”

Thinking he got the doctor, the doctor scratches his head and mumbles to himself a little. Then tells Bhola, “What you need is jar number 43…”

Before the doctor finished his sentence, Bhola fled the office.